Thursday, October 06, 2005
ok, does anyone want to go for prata on friday,with FAITH YEO :) cos that woman's leaving AGAIN. haha. though i'm not really sure if i can go down or not. because i just might have to count on my econs for that pass. which is ironical because i gave up on econs and only concentrated on math bio chem. not that math and bio is over, i think i'll want to pass my econs please.
there's been that constant, permanent worry about not making it to jc2. like what if i fail and get retained. of course there are supp papers, but what if i fail supp papers too, isn't that sad. i may just migrate to poly. this is the only year that i've not passed (having the word pass is better than 'fail') my CORE SUBJECTS. who am i kidding when i promised myself i'd pass everything. never did i mess my exams so bad. like how it didnt register just now that we had 30 mins to do the mcq, i kept thinking 1 hour. and i had half the OAS blank when ms yee started collecting. and there wasnt any reminder so i didnt think anything of it. i feel so bad cos she had to wait for me to anyhow shade stuff(not even sure whether i completed the shading)though she wasnt supposed to. someone shoot me, really. flush me down the toilet bowwl. LOUSY MEEEEEEE :/
i don't know what's my problem here. oh, all the i should haves start popping up. i'm a bad student, my brain isn't functioning like it used to, or maybe there's limited space in there. you know , the verse in the previous post, "i do not gives as the world gives", there's nothing called "many chances" in the 'world' but with God there's chance after chance, forgiveness x 10000000000000 many. :)
now i'm not even sure whether i did my best. i know my best will never measure up to the 'exam standards' and my best is this blur figure. this unknown variable marking. my best is a variable, not a constant. my best my best my best, what's my best? i'm going to chionnng econs friday saturday sunday monday.I WANT TO DROP ECONS. I WANT TO HIBERNATE. i want to be a hamsterrrrr
