Friday, November 03, 2006
GP
today's the first day of the A's and since it's 11:59, i have only one minute left to call it 'today'. exam jitters: it starts the night before, not being able to sleep easily.i stayed awake for a slightly longer time than usual and my mind start drifting, which eventually led to slumber. but then i woke up to the vibration of the handphone at approximately 530am and only managed light sleep after. then i woke up and got a blocked nose (not a good start!). never mind.
fast forward.. while climbing up the stairs to the exam room i got that sudden spurt of adrenaline(or whatever hormone yadahhh) that made me want to smile. it's so exciting don't you think? it's starting and the first (or one of the last, but if you prefer to look at life as a series of examinations or tests then no, it's only the start) important exam is going to end sooner than i know. yup, but in case you start mistaking me for a psychopath, well, i'm not! i think i only smile knowing that i will soon be released from some of those ugly restricting 'chains' that tie down us exam-takers. i didn't mention that 23rd is tha day we have freedom because i am reminded that totally freedom is idealistic and quote "one must give up claims to iindividual freedom in order to know the best way to ..." i can't remember. anyway, 23rd nov is when we have FREEDOM, and that's our definition of freedom, which is not what society defines freedom but who cares!
the GP paper was, how do i put it... weird. quite weird. but since everyone thought so i guess i'm alright and normal. let's start with the essay. when i first flipped the paper, er, i flipped. ok not really but almost. first thought "what kind of questions are these?!" i think last years paper was better. at least it was the only paper i got a 60 for! anyway, i had to choose right, so i chose "how far is your country prepared for future crises?" :/ i don't really like talking about singapore but i had to choose the best out of the horrible lot. i hope that was the right choice. the compre short questions were ok but when it came to summary and AQ, totally bleaaahh. firstly, i spent alot of time trying to find content for the summary and re-reading the question. the AQ was the killer of the paper. why must the author be that abstract. it's like ahhh, philosophy... for aq? i tried. i tried to understand the philosophical view behind it and some of my phrasing was (in exchange for the abstract statement), kinda abstract too. i hope it didn't go out of point. pooey. :/
i think the examination period has taught me important lessons (oooo!). firstly, i'm becoming a more optimistic person. it's been a long time since i was the most optimistic one but i figured that it is very important to stay positive and not let anything bring you down, especially at the crucial juncture where breakdowns are the worst case scenario. therefore people, stay happy :) smiley face! secondly (and finally), exams and results are not everything and it's not the end. i know this statement has been repeated many times but more often than not, it floats over my head then floats away but now it makes sense. i've been thinking alot, by this i mean daily, about what to do in the future, what if my results turn out like crap, which career path to take... and why i make more sense out of that piece of 'advice' is because i think i'm beginning to leave this aspect more in God's hands + trust. good, prayers half answered.
back to same old story, i have been eating alot (it's comforting to know i'm not the only one but that's not a good thing) and i feel like some glutton. somehow i have no recollection of consuming more during o level period. now i shall steer clear of any sleeveless or fitting clothes. ewww i am very digusted but it's psychological thing. it's very difficult to restrict eating and study at the same time. after this i promise i will exercise everyday and shed the extra flab and feel healthier.
